I hate cats.

I was never really fond of cats. They always struck me as a little creepy, they walk around showing off their butt holes like they own the world, and they definitely don't provide the type of affection another animal would considering you're providing them with food and shelter. It's almost like they expect it! Anyway, despite my feelings towards cats I thought it might be good to have one in the house to (1) give my parents something to do and (2) because I've never really had a pet and cats are supposed to be easy to take care of. To be quite honest, if we messed up and the pet got sick or died, I'd feel a lot worse if it were a dog. LOL is that bad?

So here I am, being righteous and benevolent driving to an animal shelter to adopt a cat, and on the way there I get pulled over AGAIN - my second speeding ticket in a month! The cop got me at 90 while merging onto the freeway but I swear I felt like I was doing 80. I wasn't weaving through traffic or anything crazy but I guess 90mph is still 90mph. This is going to make me sound like a douchebag but cars that are built to drive fast should have higher speed limits. A late-model BMW doing 90 is a lot less dangerous than a 1983 Corolla doing 90 in my opinion.

Then to make things worse when I got to the shelter I had to wait two hours to speak to an adoption counselor. When I finally got called, the lady informed me that everyone in the house needs to come "meet" the cat before we can take it home!!! WTF is that!? First of all, why didn't you tell me this BEFORE I waited two hours? And secondly, I'm doing the shelter and the cat a favor and you want me to jump through all these hoops? Keep the f'ing cat then!

Mr. Ticket and I are going to be on a first name basis...